It can be hard to know what to say when someone has experienced a loss. Even a short message can offer comfort. For example:
- “I am so sorry for your loss. Thinking of you and your family.”
- “Sending you love and strength at this difficult time.”
- “[Name] was a truly special person and will be deeply missed.”
If you feel able, including a kind memory or thought about the person who has died can be especially meaningful.
Sharing a Personal Memory
When you share a memory, it helps to make the message more personal and celebrates the life of the person who has passed. It doesn’t need to be a long story; a simple, heartfelt sentence can mean the world.
- Focus on a positive quality: “I will always remember [Name]’s incredible kindness. They always went out of their way to make everyone feel welcome.”
- Recall a specific moment: “I’ll never forget the time [Name] and I [briefly share a happy memory]. It still makes me smile.”
- Mention their impact: “[Name] was such a generous mentor to me when I first started my career. I learned so much from them.”
Phrases to Approach with Care
While well-intentioned, some common phrases can sometimes be unhelpful or inadvertently cause pain. It is often best to avoid clichés or statements that try to explain the loss. These can include:
- “I know how you feel.” (Grief is a very personal experience.)
- “They are in a better place now.” (This may not align with the recipient’s beliefs.)
- “Be strong.” (This can put pressure on someone to hide their true feelings.)
The most important thing is to be sincere. Your simple, honest expression of sympathy is what truly matters.
Signing Off the Card
Choose a closing that feels appropriate for your relationship with the person.
- With deepest sympathy,
- With love and sympathy,
- Thinking of you,
- With heartfelt condolences,
- Our thoughts are with you and your family.
